Bah, Humbug!

Oh Christ it’s Christmas once again

Shopping trips that cause me pain

Hulking parcels back and forth

Bloody Santa from up North

Riding in his sparkling sleigh

All right for him it’s just one day

For us it is the December grind

Where parents travel far to find

Some wretched gift, or plastic toy

A gift for a girl or little boy

And then there is that stupid tree

Chopped down, displayed for all to see

In our living room lit by light

Or sprayed with snow to make it white

Utter madness it seems to me

As the family gathers in misery

To fall asleep at the dining table

For they’ve eaten more than they are able.

Greedy gluttons everyone

I hope dear Santa brings a gun

To blast a hole in their festive cheer

At least I’d smile when it’s New Year.

Seasons greeting everyone

But who the hell is having fun?